The totally shame-free, actual-life, real-time blog where I tell all, show all--without nagging or whining (all right--maybe a little whining...)--in my attempt to stop being a fat middle-aged woman who avoids mirrors and clothing stores and start being a woman at home in her body...brought to you by a real woman, the Independent Weltha Herself. I won't give any advice, and I'm not asking for any--just companionship on my journey.

Every day...a new post. Every other week...my real weight. Every month...new pictures.

For every woman who has ever tried to just lose the extra weight and feel good...overall and about herself...and who lived to tell the story.


Friday, January 14, 2011

Day the 67th

Somebody just shoot me...all right, I'm kidding on that unless it's the "I'm ready for my close-up now, Mr. DeMille" sort of shoot me...it's Friday, and I seem to be finding (or being confronted with) all of my mistakes for this week...

All right, there are three, but they feel like...3 million. Am I the only person who ever struggles with this?

However! Back to the topic at hand. NO, I did not exercise last night but I had a sort-of excuse. My pay check (I get paid once a week) came last night, and I was so overjoyed, and it was already 7:30 or so, that I:
  • Cashed it
  • Bought cat food and litter
  • Went to dinner at Pei Wei (yes, and I got steamed edamame and Asian Chopped Chicken Salad, which I adoooooooooooooore)
  • Went to the Wal-Mart Super Center where I bought more cute separates including a muted purple hoodie. Well, why not? Yes, I paid some bills, too.
  • Went home - and by this time, it was around 9:30, and I needed to...feed the cats, change their water, and scoop their box. And...
  • Cut the labels off everything and put them away.

No, I didn't think it was a great excuse either, but by the time I was done, it was after 10 pm and well, I was tired, doggone it! And I still needed to take a shower because I felt tired and...tired.

So...we're gettin' on it this weekend. I mean, gettin' on it. Tonight, 8 minutes on the rebounder (because last night would have been 7 minutes...) and tomorrow, 9 minutes, and 10 minutes on Sunday and OH WHERE WILL THE MADNESS END?

Major shout-out to Jana for her comment on FB that she was following my blog and for congratulating me on this journey. Thank you! A girl needs all the help she can get!

I did, however, remember what I wanted to blog about. I have started a journal for the blog--I journal how much water I have drunk, taking vitamins and supplements, how much sleep I got (we're not doin' too hot on this one. I am simply not going to bed early enough), what I ate, whether or not I exercised and what I did, my mood (right now, it's my yickity face), things for which I am grateful, something good or kind I did for someone else, something nice I did for myself, and finally, a recap of the day. Yes, it wears me out, too.

BUT IT CAUSES ME TO BE MINDFUL OF WHAT I AM DOING INSTEAD OF JUST DRIFTING THROUGH THE DAYS..."SORTA" TRYING TO GET MORE REST, EAT BETTER, DRINK MORE WATER, ETC.

I find that American life (and you folks elsewhere feel free to chime in and tell me if it's different where you are) is conducive to being on auto-pilot. We get ourselves WAY too busy, and then we either fret over the past or we wish we were in the future ("I wish the weekend were here!"). Our minds are too busy and over-stimulated. We don't ever rest in the moment. We are elsewhere all the time.

That's part of the reason I am an Anglican (that and my addiction to incense...). You can't go into auto-pilot in the service and expect to get anything out of it. You have to be there. There is too much to do to just drift. It works well with my over-busy mind.

So...here is to a weekend of mindfulness. A weekend where I live in and enjoy and cherish and value the moment I'm in instead of regretting and trying to "redo" the past, or wishing my life away for a mythical future.

I plan to enjoy every bite of food instead of regretting things I shouldn't have eaten (too late, baby) or worrying about what I might eat that I shouldn't.

How about you....?

Independently,

Weltha

1 comment:

  1. I agree on the autopilot thing. I have recently quit (for the most part) saying "I wish it was Saturday" or "I can't wait until they're bigger and can do ___ for themselves." It just seems like we wish our lives away.

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for havin' your say! You're an INDEPENDENT WOMAN (or an INDEPENDENT MAN!), too! Just remember, this is an ADVICE-FREE ZONE...so please send the advice back to its room, and PLEASE comment about what you've done or just join in the ray-rah!

Independently,

Weltha