The totally shame-free, actual-life, real-time blog where I tell all, show all--without nagging or whining (all right--maybe a little whining...)--in my attempt to stop being a fat middle-aged woman who avoids mirrors and clothing stores and start being a woman at home in her body...brought to you by a real woman, the Independent Weltha Herself. I won't give any advice, and I'm not asking for any--just companionship on my journey.

Every day...a new post. Every other real weight. Every pictures.

For every woman who has ever tried to just lose the extra weight and feel good...overall and about herself...and who lived to tell the story.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Day the 135th - Weigh-In Wednesday - Day 7 of 30 Days of Truth

Whoa, we're busy on Blog Weltha today...Weigh-In Wednesday AND Day 7 of 30 Days Of Truth.

And now, the moment for which you have been waiting...drumroll, please.

227 on the scales this morning. I know, I was 222 LAST time...

Here's what I think. I don't think I gained 5 pounds. I think maybe--just maybe--I put on one or two (or maybe even stayed even) but I have new scales and have no idea how "correct" they are.

So...we're gonna take this as gospel (the gospel of weight-loss, not the real gospel...) and start here.

No, I don't like it either, but I'm goin' with it.

And girlfriend is gonna get jiggy with the exercise. Remember, I am buying an elliptical from my grad school friend in a few weeks...

Last night...after Lenten Study Group (which was huge fun despite sounding as boring as watching the grass grow...we laughed a whole lot. Thank you, Preston! "smaller Bible," indeed!), I came home and had some popcorn and then some homemade cocoa halvah. If you have never tried halvah, it's good for you. All it takes is tahini (sesame seed past which you can get at any health food store or in most groceries over in their Ethnic sections with the Jewish foods), mixed with some honey and then add some cocoa. It's great.

Halvah is an easy little dessert, and I have a feeling a girl could use a thicker tahini and then refrigerate the halvah and make little candies. No, you can't be swallowing honey like it's water, but a little doesn't hurt, and it really tastes good. I need to experiment making halvah with brown rice syrup or with malt something sweetener and see if that works (they have a low glycemic index; that is, they don't spike your blood sugar.) Yes, you can buy halvah but remember, it has lots of...stuff...added to it. Make your own; cheaper and better.

And remember, cocoa has antioxidents in it. It's not "the devil."

And this morning, because I was feelin' sorta better and needed to pamper myself, I got an Everything Bagel with vegetable cream cheese. And the Blackberry-Jasmine iced tea.

I mean, whatcha gonna do? Life has been rough recently, and I needed to be nice to Weltha. However, I am also going to be really nice to Weltha, stop eating bagels as if they are leaving Planet Earth in 15 minutes, and get some peppermint tea because that soothes the upset stomach and wackadoo colon. Thank you all for your kind comments. I hate feeling no bueno, but I am better today.

By the way, peppermint tea is good and it's not some insipid nasty stuff. It's good, and I can sweeten it with liquid Stevia (which is very good for sweetening cold or cool drinks...)

I swear, I'm gonna make that vegan chocolate parfait this weekend. I am. I gotta have me some chocolate. In a healthy form. I will sweeten it with Stevia crystals and I think it's going to be great. Will report back. Promise.

And now...the other moment for which you have been waiting: Day 7 of 30 Days Of Truth.

And the prompt reads:

Something You Initially Thought Was Bad And Then Realized Was Good

All right, let's take something from my youth.

I did not get a major scholarship at a private Junior College that I wanted to attend back in the Home State.

I applied for this scholarship through a women's organization that sponsored it.

"Oh, you'll get it! You're a shoo-in."

And I believed that. I had visited the college a few times, and it was only an hour away in my sister-in-law's hometown. I had played piano for ballet recitals there, and I loved it. It was a small school, very pretty, and it was close to home. Mom and Dad had said that I could defo have my own car. Woo and hoo.

So...there I was. Waiting for the news to come any day that Weltha had the scholarship.

And the letter came.

I opened it.

I didn't get the scholarship. I burst into tears. I was totally crushed. And then, I found out that the college was not offering me much in the way of financial aid. As in, not much at all. And it was April. April of my senior year in high school...

However, a family friend had walked into my mom's office a week or so earlier and told my mom that he and his wife really wanted me to apply to the college back East where both his mother and his oldest daughter had attended. They felt I was perfect for the school. In fact, he felt so strongly that he asked if he might use my mom's office phone to call the Admissions Director at the school.

He called; asking my mother for the info, he told the Admissions Director my class rank, my scores on the SAT and on a few other standardized tests, what I had been involved in as a student and a school citizen, and what kind of girl I was.

"Do you think you would have room left in the entering Freshman class this late?"

"For a girl like that, we'll make room."

And the rest...was history. I applied, was accepted, and received an incredible financial aid package. Which I needed. My dad was, after all, a school teacher. And retiring the year I graduated from high school. My mom was a part-time Executive Secretary for the American Red Cross. We're weren't exactly rakin' it in...

But there is more to the story. I went to this college. I loved it. I grew academically. I grew intellectually, and socially, and culturally. And terribly important to me, I met other Christians like me, and I grew spiritually. I found a home church--and became part of the first Christian "community" of my life.

Going back East changed my life. For the better. Perhaps the little Junior College in the Home State would have done the same thing--I will never know. But I believe that going East was God's good plan for my life. I have long-time friends from that era. I am friends with some of their children. I got to study and live in a beautiful Southern state, and I was able to travel up and down the East Coast. I loved it. I still do. I went to a great school and met great people.

When I received that letter telling me I had not received the scholarship, I felt as if it were the worst thing on earth. I felt so crushed, and I didn't know where I would go.

And then...because I lost that scholarship, and because I got such a small financial package from that school, and because a man walked into my mother's office, I went East. And it was the best thing that ever happened to me at that age. I would not trade the friends and relationships I have, nor would I trade what happened to me spiritually, for anything. This was not merely a good experience that came out of this situation--it was a GREAT experience.

Ah...bless those people for not giving me that scholarship...



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