The totally shame-free, actual-life, real-time blog where I tell all, show all--without nagging or whining (all right--maybe a little whining...)--in my attempt to stop being a fat middle-aged woman who avoids mirrors and clothing stores and start being a woman at home in her body...brought to you by a real woman, the Independent Weltha Herself. I won't give any advice, and I'm not asking for any--just companionship on my journey.

Every day...a new post. Every other week...my real weight. Every month...new pictures.

For every woman who has ever tried to just lose the extra weight and feel good...overall and about herself...and who lived to tell the story.


Friday, December 16, 2011

Day the 182nd and Day 16 of Advent

O Reader, allow me to pose a question.

Have you ever made a complete and total idiot of yourself?

And involved your friends in your making a complete and total idiot of yourself?

All right. That's two questions. I am aware of that. I can count.

Without going into any detail, let us just say that by 9 am this morning - NINE AM - I had managed to make a total and complete idiot of myself.

No, this is not my finest hour.

Dinner last night (oh let's change the subject) was two slices of pork...something...with barbeque sauce because that's all I had and my check did not come. It's late sometimes. Once in a great while, it's early. Generally, it shows its pretty face on a Thursday. But not yesterday. So, this is an additional stress because I am supposed to have a dinner guest tonight AND I haven't cooked squat because...no $$ for food.

Living on the edge is so...not delightful. Check will come. It may be there today. In fact, I'm taking 1/2 off (I worked all my hours...relax...) so I can cook and put it all together should the check come. If not, well, there you have it...My dinner guest fortunately is easy about such things. However, what really nails my hide is that I have made an idiot of myself, and I will have to see the people in whose presence I have made said idiot, and I will have to act as if I did NOT make an idiot of myself, and I feel like an even bigger idiot.

No, I haven't been eating all that great. Why do you ask?

Stress of the holidays, not eating so great, and more - and I'm not at my best.

I remember that line from A Tale of Two Cities (the film - the old one with Ronald Colman, how lovely he was, as Sidney Carton.) Carton shows up drunk on the street and hardly speaks to Lucie Manette (The Great Love Of His Life) and when he sees her again, he apologies. Her reply? "Well, we can't always be at our best." Well, here is living proof.

Today, no food. I'm getting off at 12 noon, and am going to be on my way home. So...a big ol' Mason jar of iced tea is doing nicely.

There is no thought for the day. There is no Advent Meditation.

Rather, a request.

Find someone who has made a complete and total idiot of themselves, and be kind to them whether they deserve it or not. Especially if they do not.

Try to be forgiving. People generally need forgiveness more than they need chewing out. All of us are jerks at some point.

Today is my point.

Not-So-Independently,

Weltha

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Thanks for havin' your say! You're an INDEPENDENT WOMAN (or an INDEPENDENT MAN!), too! Just remember, this is an ADVICE-FREE ZONE...so please send the advice back to its room, and PLEASE comment about what you've done or just join in the ray-rah!

Independently,

Weltha